Mental Training: Work to Fail

Many of us fear failure.  But, it is one of the best ways to grow.
In order to build muscle, we lift weights until we are tired and fail. This breaks down the muscle and allows it to grow. In order to build our cardio endurance, we run fast and hard until we almost cannot take it any longer. This builds our lung capacity and our vascular system. This process, many people seem to recognize, is the right way to fail.
The same applies to mental training. As we sit in meditation, thoughts enter our minds. This is not failure, but part of the process. It is a necessity to watch what we are doing. If we work with visualization, the clarity of that visualization ebbs and flows. The ebbing is not failure. We can learn and note how the creation of that visualization has similarities to the ebbing and flowing of narratives we tell each other about our purported reality. Sometimes we go too far, our practice becomes tight and difficult. By crossing that line, we learn how to relax back into a peaceful state.
The same applies when we work with our emotions. When our work colleague triggers an angry response in us, we will begin to notice it more clearly as we train our minds. The noticing is not failure. Noticing is the first step to changing behavior. The next time something similar occurs, perhaps we will have the patience to avoid anger. We can sit and just watch. Then, we will slowly be able to handle more and more difficult situations calmly and with wisdom. Without a willingness to engage in circumstances in which we might fail to be calm, we will never grow emotionally stronger.
Despite our fear, failure can be very positive. Edison failed to invent the light bulb hundreds of times before finding the right materials. Each time he learned something new. The successful entrepreneur is the one who has more endurance than her competitors, continuing to work even after enduring a few failures. Each failure is a lesson on how to build a better company.
So let’s not fear failure. Failure is the key to life. It allows us to learn, growing and make personal progress.